September 13, 2004 | Category: Funny | No Comments »

Source http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=2557 accessed 14-Sept-2004.

Should I marry my guy?
By Mama Gena

Dear Mama,
I am a 31-year-old female in need of your help. I’ve been dating Dennis exclusively for about 18 months now, and the “M” word has come up (which, by the way, is not the problem). I must admit, he is quite the opposite of what I’ve always gone for. Dennis is 34 and currently an exterminator, he lives in an attic apartment on the bad side of town and drives a beat up 17-year-old car. He seems to be perfectly content with his way of living. He does not seize opportunities to better his life and is the worst with keeping appointments and promises. What I like about him is he’s nice and caring, a good cook, loyal, social, can be romantic and he’s a good conversationalist. My dislikes are that he’s indecisive, noteestablished, short, bald and round, lacks drive and has low expectations in life. I know in my heart that I do love him, however, I don’t know if it’s enough to sustain that “happy ever after” that I someday hope to experience. My concerns are (realizing that looks aren’t everything) would I not be a good woman if I couldn’t look beyond my partner’s looks or truly listen to him when I know he’s just talking to be talking? I often wonder Dennis is really capable of raising a family and being an adequate provider. I’m striving to be unselfish and do the right thing, but I feel so confused…

Please help.
— Dating Exterminator

Dear Ms. Exterminator -
Oh my, oh my, come rest thy weary head on Mama’s knee and allow her to spin you a little yarn. We have to clear that sweet little head of yours and set you to rights about who and what a man is, so you can make a great decision. Did you ever hear the story about Beauty and the Beast? Belle, a lovely young woman, met this hairy fat beast with really bad table manners. He was gruff on the outside, but he had a pure heart. Belle fell in love with this beast. And it was through her love and training that he turned into a prince. See, guys on their own recognizance won’t necessarily aim very high. A beer and a channel-changer is about enough excitement for them. But a man with a woman by his side, a woman who wants things from him, a woman who sees his potential and is unafraid of asking the best of him, oh, my darling, that man has a shot at becoming a hero. Dennis is your friend; he is attentive to you and your desires, right? That’s a great start. Now it’s time for you to ask him for everything you want: Where you want to live, what career you want to see him in, what kind of life you want to create together. He has the potential to take care of you in any style you desire, just point him in the right direction and enjoy the unfolding adventure of turning your beast into your prince! If you want some inspiration from your predecessors, check out how Nancy Reagan inspired Ronald. Or how Annette Bening inspires Warren Beatty. Or Goldie Hawn with Kurt Russell. Join the ranks of the brilliant man-trainers of the world:

Women who use men to fulfill their dreams and desires!
——————————————————————————–
Regena Thomashauer (Mama Gena), Creatrix and CEO of Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts, is the author of Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts and Mama Gena’s Guide To Owning And Operating Men. She dedicates her life to researching the nature of pleasure and its relationship to health, well-being and overall fulfillment. Mama Gena has appeared on Late Night with Conan O’Brien and The Today Show. She has been profiled in The New York Times, Elle, and New York Magazine. Visit Mama at www.mamagenas.com or send her your dating questions to askmama@match.com.

Listen to me..
NO! that guy is like that for a reason. Women love your guy for who he is. Don’t try to change him, it will leave you frustrated tired (I’d say headache but you probably already have one of those). Trust me, if you marry a lazy arse he will remain a lazy arse no matter what you do.
In fact I think your in violation of marriage rules. Don’t be suprised if he decides to leave you. I mean who wants that type of headache. You marry a frog no matter how much you kiss him he won’t become a prince, sure with enough pushing he may take the trash out or at most, cut the lawn grass but thats as far as its going to get.

If you were just with him until a better looking guy came along then I suggest, either taking a look in the mirror, or moving on. Give the poor guy a break. This type ‘Change your mans behaviour’ will definitely leave you with an unhappy marriage.

..and no I’m not living proof.