November 30, 2006 | Category: Funny, Life, Rant | 2 Comments »

Recently I have had to catch the train in the mornings and I must say its a sorry affair. Rarely have I seen a train arrive on time and when it does its a most joyous occasion. I feel like running to the nearest coffee stand and buying the conductor a chocolate muffin. Just to commerate and make the occasion more special than it already is. I mustn’t wallow though. Its not the staffs fault.

Whomever runs my towns train service, has no sense of timing or has plainly given up all hope. I mean what does it matter if a train is half an hour here or there. Or even if when it does arrive on time the condition of the tracks will surely cause the driver to tread so slowly that one feels like jumping off the train and running side by side in the hope of beating it to the next station.

Whilst the driver is worried about derailing the train. My mind wanders off into the western cowboy era. Where trains were once robbed by men on horseback and the train drivers tried desparatly to throw more coal into the engine to make it chug along faster. I can almost hear the trains ‘choo choo’. The trains in these old westerns certainly appear to be moving at a far more rapid pace than their modern equivalents.

This brings to my mind a scare crow tactic. What would happen if I got a couple of friends to chase after the train in a bravado ol’ western, on horse back, train robbing kind of way. Wouldn’t that make for a more entertaining morning.

Catching the train is one thing but the wait in the mornings is aweful. The poor conductor who’s, voice is ever apparent, apoligising for every late train. He would surely die young of a heart attack. It really is that rare something actually turning up on time. Which is probably why he wisely choose to record his voice and have it replayed for every train which isn’t on its track yet.

My final rant which tops it all off and surely has to be the icing on the cake, is the benches which are outside for the happy soon to be sad travellers. I have no idea which design guru was consultated in this decision but he should be commended. And his prize should be to have his trousers removed and be made to sit on these lovely steel ‘ub3r cold’ chrome finished bench, only until the next train arrives.

You see this bright guru, for reasons unknown to me, decided to use kewl looking metal benches. Now maybe this guru was frequent with back end action and needed to cool down his butt. Because coupled with the cold British weather and butt on steel the cooling action could be compared with the cooling action of heart burn medicine without the obvious happy effect. I’m not saying I’ve got a hot ass, well depends in which context.

I read in the paper the price of train tickets is going up which will make it the most expensive form of public transport. The extra money I believe won’t be put to improving services. But to more kewl looking steel benches for people to freeze their butts & wait for the next train.

January 27, 2006 | Category: Rant | 2 Comments »

I did a rant about Memoirs of a Geisha at Eternal Forums

Going back to Memoirs of a Geisha, I can’t really comment on the Chinese actors vs Japanese actors. Being honest I would not have been able to tell the difference. I think the issue here is a little like saying Geisha’s were Japanese, Kyoto is in Japan and what the hell would China know about Geisha; or putting it another way, how possibly could Chinese actors portray Japanese culture. Also I read about Gong Li acting the part of Hatsumomo badly, not true, she was very convincing and played the part exactly how I’d imagined.What you have to understand is that even though the story is based on a real life person, the story is a fiction and isn’t 100% accurate. So much so in fact the woman who the story is based on sued the the author Arthur Goldman for mentioning her name in first edition books. There was also outrage over the whole Mizuage (coming of age ceremony source ) which apparently isn’t true.

The two gripes I had about the movie was the fact that certain parts of the story are left off from the book. For instance why is young Chiyo sold by her father at the beginning of the movie. And you can’t tell from watching the film that she is actually sold. Straight away the story takes a hit as the audience cannot relate to her or why she is being taken away or that her father couldn’t afford to keep her and her sister and also the fact that he was promised good care would be taken of them. She just looks like a kid being whisked around the place.

There is so many other parts such as before the big Spring Festival Dance how the poster was created is completely missed out. Which is a really kewl part of the book.

The second issue I had was that the movie was in English. I would have killed for it to be subtitled. Something which the DVD will cure I’m sure. For me it sounds strange because as a viewer you’re transported to an eastern setting, but somehow they speak perfect English, which just doesn’t fit. I read some of the yanks didn’t like the fact that some of the actors had British accents.

Tara’s review of Memoirs of a Geisha confirms what I believed. After seeing the movie, many people will see it just as a typical boring love story. The movie makers have sadly managed to lose the connection with its audience, which the book did very well.

Where it doesn’t fail is in capturing the Beauty of the whole Geisha era. You have to understand that Steven Spielberg is one of the producers on this film and the cinematography doesn’t disappoint.

Yeah I’m a huge fan of the book and the whole Geisha thing.

Before I get dissed I’d like to mention:
Q: What are the common misconceptions that you want to clear up?
A: The most common misconception is that geisha are somehow high-class courtesans, or prostitutes. And that is very much not the case. And also, geisha are not submissive and subservient, but in fact they are some of the most financially and emotionally successful and strongest women in Japan, and traditionally have been so.
: )